I began my PhD in Philosophy at Durham University (UK) in 2022. Since then, to my surprise, many BA and MA students interested in pursuing doctoral studies have approached me to pick my brain. Despite their diverse backgrounds and research interests, they all seemed primarily concerned with the same question: How can one be successful in academia?
There’s nothing wrong with this—expecting our hard work to pay off is only natural. But what does it mean to be a successful academic? For these students, success often meant securing a spot in a PhD program, producing numerous publications, and eventually landing a permanent university position. These are undoubtedly significant achievements, especially considering how scarce opportunities are. However, I firmly believe this only partially answers the question. You can achieve all of that and still fall short of true success in the most meaningful sense.
Famous pop star Selena Gomez captures my view well in one of her songs:
The world can be a nasty place
You know it, I know it, yeah
We don’t have to fall from grace
Put down the weapons you fight with
And kill ’em with kindness
Unfortunately, academia is often a highly toxic environment. Worse still, climbing the academic ladder can seem to require becoming toxic yourself. Consciously or not, many scholars adopt a Hobbesian view of academia, where the natural state is one of competition: homo homini lupus (“man is a wolf to man”). Aspiring academics are expected to compete fiercely with one another to have any chance of success.
Even if this approach secures the coveted position, I refuse to call it genuine success. There is more to life than a fancy job title or a long list of publications. Because of this, whenever a junior colleague asks me how to succeed in academia, after discussing application materials, networking, and other practicalities, I always highlight the often-overlooked need to be kind.
To be clear, I haven’t “made it” in academia. I am only a bit further along than some of my younger peers. But I am certain of one thing: whatever I’ve accomplished so far has been made possible by the kindness of more experienced colleagues. Academia is unpredictable, and you rarely know for sure what factors contribute to a particular outcome. Every small gesture can make a difference. This means that academia provides an opportunity to maximize the impact of your actions—for better or worse. When scholars forget to be kind, a massive amount of potential academic value is wasted. And that can hardly be considered success.
Here’s the key point: as a graduate student, you might not be able to do much for the senior academics who helped you. But you can do a great deal for those who come after you. Within your capacity, be kind and support them whenever possible. By doing so, you help transform the toxic academic culture into one grounded in kindness.
Finally, remember to be kind to yourself. Academic life can significantly affect your physical and mental well-being. If possible, go to therapy, schedule regular medical check-ups, stay active, and maintain connections with family and friends. These things may seem obvious, but academics—including myself—often neglect them in the name of work. Remember, no fancy job title or number of publications is worth sacrificing your health.
Academia can be a nasty place. You know it, I know it. So, if you want to be truly successful, kill ’em with kindness.
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